In Total Disarray

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

In my current situation, I can only describe it as such. I don't know what I'm doing... what I'm thinking... but if there's anything that came out of the past few days of brooding/ pondering/ deliberations/ whatever, it's this; I know things aren't the way we'd like it to be, and that you think it might be best to just drop it, and that you just don't want to be burdened by this. I don't even know if you still feel the same way... but I still do. I don't know where things went wrong... but I really wished they can be made right. I have not... cannot give up just like that! Still... if you were to truly be happier, to truly be much better off if I did, then out of my love for you, I will do it, although it causes me much pain. Corny? Maybe... but it is the truth about how I feel... about what's been going on through my mind...

I look to God, for even in the deepest, darkest period in my life, He is there with me. Sometimes I marvel at how other people survive when they don't have Him. I know I wouldn't be able to... I place my trust in You, O Lord, that whatever it is You have in store for me, whatever it is You have planned, that it will come to pass, for I pray, God, let Your Will, not mine be done...

I pray now that you cover her with the blood of Jesus, that she might be under your protection everyday of her life. I pray also that You annoint the works of her hands, that they may prosper be it her studies, her ministry or her interests. I ask further, O Lord, that You bless the relationships that she has with her friends and her family members. Lastly I pray that she continue to grow in You, that You will reveal Yourself to her more and more each day, so that she can be more and more Christlike. I commit her into Your hands, for that is all that I can do... Amen

Posted by Gerald at 12/28/2005 02:42:00 AM