Personal Blather!

I'm going to try this poem thing again.

Creative Designs

Atrocious, Cried he, as he looked at his screen,
Never before such rubbish have I seen!
Try harder please, for your work is pathetic!
Don't take it personally, I'm not trying to be cryptic.

Enlarge that image, clean it up please,
Such basic rules, you ought to know these,
I think it can work, though lots must be done,
Good luck and hang in there, it can be quite fun!

Now if you are stuck, don't worry, helps on the way,
For Google™'s your friend, just use it they say,
Online tutorials, there are millions out there,
Ripe with design knowledge, for all those who care.

Never be fearful, of playing around,
Unless it's a person, that will cause a few frowns,
To design is quite fun, it's quite addictive too,
So start up Photoshop™, if you want to be cool!

I got this little idea from my friend. Let's see just how well my poetic juices flow...

The Jester

Lay he in bed, trying hard to think,
Of life and of love, though hopeless him being,
Noone could grasp, what he felt deep inside,
Even though he had many, of his friends close beside.

Liven up the mood, his duty and calling,
In spite of his circumstance, he never stop trying,
Noone is perfect, but worked hard he did,
Even though failures, trailed him instead.

Stood he in public, and wooed hearts a-many,
Spreading much laughter, in a life so contrary,
Performed hard he did, to the best of his ability,
Lucky for him, he earned quite a bit of money.

At the end of the day, he gathered his due,
Going back to his home, again feeling blue,
Unseen by all people, his face so forlorn
Expecting and wishing, for joy in the morn.

Ever came to a point where you have a decision to make on what to do, or whether or not you should even be doing anything? There are many times when you know that on hindsight, what you did was wrong, or inappropriate, or done with bad taste, or done at the wrong time... How do you tell? We can follow our hearts sure, but very often, we have to follow our heads too. Isn't it true that there are some things that you know if you DID follow your heart, you'd be in big trouble? And I'm not just talking about those morally wrong or criminally wrong things either. If I'd followed my heart, I might end up pissing a lot of people off because doing solely what's in your heart negates using our heads.

I really think decisions should be based on both your heart and your head. For example, when to tell someone off is very important since if you just do it as and when you like, you may just end up losing a friend, making an enemy and possibly generate a lot of other problems along the way. Your head will tell you that although you WANT to do something now, perhaps there's a BETTER way to handle the situation.

However, using both your head and your heart generates one BIG problem, there are now too many variables that sometimes, you don't know which is the decision you should follow. Too many "but what ifs" pop up and you start thinking about all the possible consequences, weighing what you feel against what you think will happen as a result of that. Life would be much easier if we could follow either or, but doing so causes a person to be either totally self centered or extremely unhappy.

I think I'm personally on the "head" side significantly more. True, there are times when I fail to stop and think things through, but even so, when the opportunity arises, I always spend as much time as I can coming up with the 'right' answer. Most of the time, I give up on what my heart wants, and that may be why I may not exactly be the happiest person around, but I do try. I sometimes wish I could just ignore the consequences of whatever it is I do and just go and do what I want. Fulfilling my personal desire may make me a possibly 'happier' person, but I think I might also end up being extremely self centered and ignorant of others. HOw do you balance up the two? Where do you draw the line?

There are times when I look back and a part of me regrets what I did, or what I didn't do. But there are also times when I'm grateful for the same reasons, because they make me who I am today. I learned patience for example, and it is something which I believe makes me a better person. True, I might have had my desire (whatever it was that I was impatient with) fulfilled and could've enjoyed it. After all, it might have been something I've really wanted all along. But by holding back I learned something else; I built my character and gained experience. Isn't that important too?

Sometimes, my heart gets overwhelmed that I just want to go and do something! It's at this time that my head tells me it may not be the right thing. The warring factions cause me to be unsure of what to think or do. Is it definitely flesh vs spirit? If so, how do you tell? The Bible tells us this:

"Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him…" (Psalm 37:5-7a, NIV).

Now, what if that very thing you have to decide upon is actually what HE is giving you to fulfill this scripture? Would you then withold your hand from taking it? If God gives you the desires of your heart, or rather, WHEN He does, how do you know it's definitely from Him? I was taught that a it takes two to tango, both God and you working hand in hand. He does His part, you have to do yours. I did a little search and found this: CLICK I agree with it all, but I raise the question that when God actually gives you that desire, how do you know it's yours for the taking?

I guess the answer lies in your relationship with Him. I try to spend as much time as I can in His presence, and it's great. I also don't think hearing from God comes just like that. We have to keep trying, doing what we hear even if we do not understand and in that process, open our ears even bigger to hear more. Lord, I trust in You.

I realised a big flaw in my posts, they always seem to be a mixture of a lot of thoughts instead of one single focussed one. I guess it's because I try to unload all that's on my mind everytime I post and I don't exactly have only one thought at a time...

I remember talking to some people about personalities, about temperaments and how different people react differently to a given situation. Many would've heard of the DISC personality test as well as the temperaments test. It helps us to understand a little about others, but it can also lead to a negative outcome. Some have ended up categorising others and this isn't healthy since a person's personality can and will change.

The last time I took the test, I was classified as an S... a VERY HIGH S person. An S person is generally steady, taking things as they come, seldom unfazed and values very much the relationship instead of the task at hand. Now I think this is pretty true, although of late, I'm beginning to think that my D side has risen a little. Either that, or I seem to be forcing myself to be D to the point it's become instinctive, but inside I'm really very S. D and S are polar opposites. A high D person is demanding, task oriented, dominating and basically wants things done his/her way. These are the people who make good leaders because they are very focussed on the task and has a very high drive to succeed. I believe that perhaps although I was originally extremely high S with almost non-existant D, being pushed into positions where responsibility counts for a lot has made my D side rise significantly.

Of course, there are other personalities too, like I and C. I people are influential, charismatic, talk a lot, funny etc. C people are generally quiet but meticulous people who are sticklers for details. I guess if you look at it from a different perspective, a successful team is one where all four personalities are fully maximised, and each person plays their roles well. We need leaders who are demanding, supportive people who keep the team together, highly talkative and charismatic people to portray results and to motivate others, as well as people to work out all the little details that others miss.

I think personalities apply to relationships too, but I guess it can always be worked out anyway. Perhaps it does not come as a surprise since your personality would affect what you're looking for in another person... although I'm not too sure it's the most important thing...

So let this S sign off by saying that in everything you do, do spare a thought for the people involved... you may not like it, but sometimes the decision that hurts u most can be the right decision.

So it's finally over. World Cup 2006 ended with France getting ousted by Italy at the penalty shootouts. It was a very exciting match I must say, and there was enough action to keep you stuck on the edge of your seat throughout. France converted an early penalty to a goal with Zidane putting the ball just under the crossbar, causing the ball to go into the goal and then bouncing out. It was still a goal though, and the referee called it. Italy equalised in the same half, but the rest of the match was goalless. It wasn't without any tries and spectacular saves though.

To be perfectly honest, I didn't really think both teams deserved to be in the finals. Still, luck does play a huge part in football, and it seemed to be on France's side, with a goodly number of close calls where Italy nearly found the back of France's net. In the end however, they proved tenacious enough to hold on through to the end, and finally winning the cup. I never held Italy in very high regard, not because they didn't play good football. They certainly have great talent and I am still amazed by Canavaro's performance. The problem is that they don't actually seem to play all that fair. I mean, if they were as good as they are, why did they have to resort to play acting, diving and in other words, cheating? It's not like they didn't have the capabilities to win. Their performance when they faced Australia really caused me to lose a great amount of respect for such an otherwise fine team. The fact that the Italian Serie A is being plagued by scandals at this moment don't help either. That's not to say I supported France in the finals though. I guess if I did, it was simply because I didn't really want Italy to win.

Anyway, against my deepest resentments, Italy won. The World Cup was hoisted by Canavaro and it's finally at the end. About time too, I think it's time EVERYONE caught up on sleep.

I'm finally back in hall. Nothing much happening just yet, except I'm tired and I think I need sleep. I think I ought to turn in early tonight... Till next time I have a gripe...

Yes, I haven't been updating as regularly. I do have some updates though, so this should explain a little about what's been happening.

Firstly, I FINALLY settled my bash. It's on the 31st of August at ButterFactory, Clarke Quay. To all Raffles Hall residents, I kindly ask for your support for this event. I know it's on a Thursday and it might be a little difficult for some of you to come, but I can't help it if clubs find it hard to give us a place on Friday/Saturday. To all my friends reading this, I'm booking you early so you BETTER come.

I went to recce the various clubs a few days ago. It wasn't an all out, 'visit as many clubs as possible' session, but we did have quite a few in mind. We headed for those only and found out that some of them were pretty nice, while others were downright unusable. I must admit, I really wanted a weekend for the bash, but the cheapest any decent club offered was $10 per head, which is a real rip off. Being a relative freshie to the clubbing scene, I'm grateful to have some help from others regarding this matter. I think my team did quite well considering none of us were really much of the clubbing type. I think the recce outing was quite fun! We had Hainanese Chicken Rice at Chinatown which turned out to be really good and cheap. I want to go again sometime...

Cell was great too. We'll be having our barbecue tomorrow, so I hope to enjoy myself. We will be having prawns too, which reminds me of my council chalet. *Reminisces*

Further good news would be that I finally start my 'work' in July. Hopefully I manage to learn something in the process too. I'll also be going back to KL for about a week next Tuesday. Make your calenders free for me thank you.

I've been checking out PHP again, and although it can be a headache, I'm just glad there's enough open source software out there that I can simply use. I really need to sit down and actually read things up without getting too discracted with other things.

I think things will turn interesting the coming weeks. Thank goodness He's been around to help me out so much. I'm really thankful and grateful to Him...

On a side note, Germany won Argentina, and I was right: They DID go to penalties...

Tags: Bash, Raffles Hall, Butter Factory, Clubbing, PHP